A Honolulu woman – and mother of four - is creating what she hopes will be a "how to" guide for overworked and overwhelmed mothers – a "Mom Code". Her ideas have taken off across the internet and have been featured nationally on Fox News.
We all know being a mom comes with added pressures. Wouldn't it be nice to relieve some of that stress? The idea for a Mom Code started six weeks ago over dinner. Author and "mom-preneur" Eileen Wacker and her friends were lamenting about the challenges of motherhood.
"You just feel intense pressure all the time to do the best you can for your kids, and you don't always know how to do it, and it sometimes appears as if everybody's doing it better. But the reality is, they're not," explains Wacker.
She decided to put together some groundrules - a code - for moms to unite. First rule: Limit the "Mama Drama". Stop putting pressure on yourself and your family by creating mountains out of molehills. Second: Make a little "me time" a priority. You've heard the sayings, 'If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy' and 'Happy Wife, Happy Life'!
Third: Save face. Realize all parents and children have flaws. Wacker uses this example: "Sometimes, when you're sitting there, you feel a little bit bad and you think, 'God I must be a pretty poor mom because my kids are not eating all organic food. They eat Kraft macaroni more than anything else' … when you pull back the curtains, it's not perfect anywhere."
Fourth: Get wired. Learn to text, Twitter, and Facebook - not to spy on your kids but to relate to them. Lastly: Stand up to "Mom Tormentors" – those teachers, coaches, or whoever - who show no empathy. "I can't tell you how many moms won't really say anything because they don't want it to come back to their child. So, it's really about having the confidence and having the diplomacy to speak up and to advocate, but do it politely."
Wacker's friends - those with kids and without - say the code brings new perspective to motherhood. " … who you are and your value and your credibility and not just so-and-so's mom or so-and-so's wife," says Linda Lockwood.
Michelle Uchiyama, also a mother of four, adds, "I consider it a healing process. When you actually see it in writing, in black and white, how someone that you don't even really know, has actually chimed in and said, 'I totally agree with this. I can totally relate!'"
Wacker hopes to expand on the Mom Code idea in books and perhaps, eventually a movie. For more information, check out Wacker's website oncekids.com.